Review: DOOM: The Dark Ages — Revelations

I booted Revelations expecting “more Dark Ages.” What I got was id politely stealing my Shield Saw, handing me a Chain Spear, and watching me die while my thumbs argued with new muscle memory. It felt rude. It was also the best decision the DLC makes.

Story-wise, the expansion wants you bruised: health/armor ceilings feel knocked back, the BFC fantasy is yanked, and the Slayer’s left hand becomes about mobility instead of tanking. Frozen Hell isn’t just a palette swap — the levels read colder, meaner, more puzzle-adjacent. I slowed down in ways base Dark Ages rarely forced.

Learning to love the spear (after dying a lot)

The Chain Spear is grappling hook, glaive, projectile, dash, and parry tool in one left-hand slot. Throw, reel yourself in, steer with the stick, fly over a heavy, orbit while shooting — it’s Eternal airtime grafted onto Dark Ages grit. Platinum upgrades unlock the spicy bits: mid-air slams, jab strings, longer orbits. Early on, the fun toys are gated, which made the first arenas feel like homework.

My personal villain: the parry input. Spear slash-parry isn’t on the same button comfort zone as the Shield Saw block/parry. In a game built on reflex, that half-second brain stutter got me killed more than any Champion. When the campaign eventually lets you juggle spear and shield again, I became a coward in the best way — shield for the rhythm I trusted, spear for traversal and when I wanted to show off.

Arenas, endgame, and the “one more preset” problem

Combat encounters in the new campaign are some of the best Dark Ages has done — layered vertical spaces that reward grappling between fodder like they’re trampolines. Ripatorium 3.0 is where I lost track of time: Hell’s Core, Osseus, Classic, saveable presets, shorter passcodes, toggles for respawns and resource sadism. Beating Revelations demons unlocks them for custom waves. I told myself I’d sleep after one Master Arena. I lied.

Caveats from my notes: Spear upgrades don’t carry back into the base campaign the way I selfishly wanted, and if you bounced off Dark Ages’ weight, Revelations won’t convert you — it sharpens the thesis. At $19.99 (or baked into Premium), I got my money’s worth the night the orbit tech finally clicked and a fight I’d been eating dirt on turned into a highlight reel.

Closing frag

Revelations is the expansion that made me relearn Doom with a grin and a bruised ego. 8.4 — not perfect, deeply replayable, and the first DLC in a while that changed how my hands move.

Score: 8.4 / 10 — Slayers Club.